The Comedians of Comedy – Portland

Portland is always a great city to visit and this time wasn’t an exception. We were staying at the hotel that’s part of the Doug Fir Lounge on the other side of the river on Burnside. Once I got everybody checked in, I immediately went across the bridge to see Jaguar Love‘s debut show and These Arms Are Snakes at Dante’s. Man, that makes it two run-in’s with members of Pretty Girls on this tour (so far). Only got to see a nano-second of Jaguar Love, but thought they would easily be snatched up by Matador which’d explain why Chris Lombardi was there front and center with a cocktail in his hand.

Next was Subarachnoid Space who I regretably didn’t get to see for too long as I was hungry and needed to get some food inside me. I went to Voodoo Donuts and then to the burrito trailer in the parking lot next to Dante’s. On the way back, I grabbed a Diet Pepsi from the gas station across the block. All of this would be useless information if it weren’t for what was about to happen….

So I’m standing in front of Dante’s, drinking my DP and watching TAAS through the door. Just minding my own business. After about 30 seconds, the big, black-suited bouncer from Dante’s comes up and asks me if I plan to come back into the venue. Thinking that he was referencing the soda I had in my hand, I immediately said "yeah, but not with this drink". He immediately starts going into this accusatory stance suggesting that the bottle has something OTHER than Diet Pepsi. I should also add that, although he’s 6’7" and towering above me, he’s 6 inches from my face. I start thinking that the Snakes are fucking with me, but I decide to run with it as I have nothing to lose. This goes on for another 2 minutes and I eventually get exasperated and say "man, could you just take it down a notch? Everything’s fine." This, obviously, put the bouncer into a tailspin and he suggested that I keep on walking down the street. I flitter around for another 30 or so seconds, but decide it best that I leave instead of possibly get mangled by this guy for being neither drunk, nor disorderly in public. And who thought you couldn’t get into trouble by NOT drinking?

Me and Patton, Ground Control

Anywhoozle, the next day was mostly catching up with an ex-girlfriend who moved out there and a cousin, his wife and new bambini before I take the comedians to Borders for a 5:30 in-store. After I dropped them off, I made my way to the Roseland Theater to set up and prepare for the show.

All in all, the show was fantastic. Patton brought Maria and Brian out toward the end to go through this new character that Maria had been working on after meeting this crazy woman in Seattle. Good stuff.

Patton closed the show but almost got the show SHUT DOWN when he was sipping single malt and sharing it among the first couple rows of the ALL AGES crowd. Ugh. It got ugly there for a minute with the owner, but everything was smoothed out in no time.

The after show was an easy 1/2 block jaunt to Ground Kontrol which is a vintage video game arcade across the street. Sooooooo much fun. Q*Bert, Galaga and Battlezone games raged as The Byrds were BLARING out of the house sound system. Kinda great, but just a shade too loud for 2:30 in the morning.

Me and Brian, Ground Control

Patton and I decide to leave and forget to hit Voodoo Donuts on the way back to the hotel. Although we decided to sit up and talk at the lounge, we opt for hittin’ the hay for our 5:45 van call. The trip to the airport two hours later devolved into Brian, Patton and I arguing as to whether Vanilla Ice and C&C Music Factory were either "Hardcore Rap" or "Hip Hop" or, as I was suggesting, they were just "throwin’ down". Yes, discussions can be very stupid on 2 hours of sleep. Los Angeles awaits.