Chunklet

Very recently, the wife and I were giving a Mancunian guitarist a ride to a downtown airport hotel after he had just played the big arena north of Atlanta. When he saw that Van Halen were scheduled to play at the same venue in February, he proceeded to tell a very funny story about when he met Van Halen in the year after Diamond Dave was kicked out of the band in 1986. Names and places to this story are unimportant (if I were telling the story in person, they obviously would though) but he tells of Sammy Hagar being overly friendly, Eddie Van Halen looking like a smiling retard the entire time on stage and Alex being the worst drummer he'd ever seen. Utter hilarity.

Then again, if Van Halen just kept with what worked, the "dark years" (aka "Anything With Sammy") would never have happened. Sure, they had number one songs and albums, but dammit, Dave was the soul of the band! The zen-cum-slapstick comedian of the group! I defy you to prove me otherwise.

I basically blew a big rock radio campaign when I fought with two separate regional bosses about this issue. Anyone that can find me a moment post-DLR that even comes close to the screams and overall attitude in this performance (or countless others), I'll buy you a Waborito or whatever schlock Sammy's sellin.
DLR forever.

Posted by Jonah Matranga @ 03/22/2010 06:55 PM

It's also common knowledge that Eddie blew a fuse cos DD shagged hi girl. Is it true... who cares?

Van Halen with DD rocks! Van Hagar done some some good rock music but it wasn't the same.

Dave Lee Roth continued to entertain, Crazy From The Heat was a blast, Eat Em & Smile was crazeee, Skyscraper was amazing...

Eddie who???

Mick ;-)

Posted by Mickey P. @ 01/16/2010 08:28 AM

sammy hagar=jay leno

Posted by thetruth @ 01/13/2010 04:34 AM

I love it! This vocal track is sick!! VH is the greatest American rock-n-roll band ever! Without Dave they were still great. Just different. Diamond Dave had the bravado that helped catapult this band to superstardom. Although not the greatest singer he made up for it in showmanship and swagger.

Posted by Will Tingle @ 07/15/2009 04:54 PM

*****

Dave was never kicked out of the group. Its common knowledge among fans that he quit.

*****

Posted by JMD @ 11/12/2008 12:57 AM

Here's a DLR/Kraftwerk mashup I made: Runnin' with the Calculator.

Posted by Chronophobe @ 02/27/2008 09:57 AM

I saw them in 1984 for the first time... I was a late bloomer. Caught the reunion in DC last year. The whole time I was SO pis't that they deprived us of that dammed hot RnR for ALL of these years... and now their way over the hill, I guess if you didn't see 'em back then, you never saw Van Halen. the new show just doesn't hold up! sorry. look for vids on youtube...

Posted by BriScrye @ 02/25/2008 03:22 PM

Here's Diamond Dave's duet with Steve Harwell of Smash Mouth... http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dMfX9fu2030

Posted by Urgh @ 02/22/2008 09:20 PM

Forgive me for the obvious remix cliché. It's infantile, but it works.

Runnin' With The Chimpunks

A huge stage, with a tiny rodent, in even tinyer tightpants.

Nice.

-Biggs

Posted by Mr. Biggs @ 02/19/2008 06:50 PM

Bono+JB=DLR?

Posted by dagnabbit @ 02/18/2008 10:34 PM

I bet it sounds better when chunklet sings it in the shower while rubbing up the genie with Herbal shampoo...

Posted by EdTheRed @ 02/18/2008 08:28 PM

You should try isolating some Aerosmith vocal some time, they are even funnier! Most Rock vocals are over the top just like that, when you hear them alone you think WTF?

Posted by Dinofond @ 02/13/2008 12:56 PM

The first Montrose '73 and the the first VH '78 lps are genius. I just saw VH for the 9th time a few weeks ago (my tickets are at link above). Dave sounded and looked great. I wanted to boycott the fact that Michael Anthony was not invited but a free ticket changed my mind. Wolfie was pretty damn impressive but there is nothing like the vintage Mighty Van Halen. I made my buds laugh when I yelled "I don't feel 60" during Hot For Teacher...

Sammy, Dave and Michael Anthony rock - It's the greedy Van Halen's that started this stupid "choose sides' war. Fuck those guys. At this most recent show Diamond Dave was all over the place while Eddie and Wolfie were like a Cars concert and stood still.

Posted by H. Michael Karshis @ 02/12/2008 11:34 AM

Pah -- ain't no way Sammy could split his "whoo-hoos" and "ahh-yeahs" into chords like that. This is pure hessian throat-singing, a thing of majesty indeed. I want more!

One of my favorite Dead Kennedys lyrics ever: "See the Aryan bozo with the red guitar parachute onto the White House lawn / Gonna bomb the commies with his air guitar / So dumb he can't drive 55!"

Posted by aaron @ 02/11/2008 04:12 PM

that is the greatest track ever. why was that not released acapella? I had never heard the kazoo in the middle of that song before now.

Posted by bob @ 02/10/2008 03:00 PM

That should show all you van hagar fans the truth cuz Diamond Dave is the badest mofo of all time!!!!!!!

Posted by Mike Friar @ 02/05/2008 12:01 AM

I don't feel tardy....

Posted by joshua @ 02/02/2008 01:34 AM

I opened up like 6 windows at once and Rockt out with DAVE-A-PELLO
R

Posted by Robbie Sammons @ 02/01/2008 04:03 PM

REMIX!!!!
http://www.sendspace.com/file/f8up3o

Posted by RyanMcG @ 02/01/2008 02:56 PM

Where did this track come from? Are there more solo-ed tracks available?? This is gold.

Posted by The Hitmaker @ 02/01/2008 02:09 PM

Mac! PC! Star Trek! Babylon 5! Dracula! Frankenstein! Coke! Pepsi! McDonalds! Burger King! Marxism! Capitalism! Pistols! Clash! Sammy! Dave!

it's a war with no winners, my friends.

i was an enormous fan of sammy hagar, especially his solo album "reckless", in the time it came out. then he came around with that "can't drive 55" crap and his overblown morning in america opinions and became about as interesting as ted nugent.

as for VH no. 1 through Diver Down - some of the most lethal rock and roll ever recorded. and i'm old enough to have listened to a lot of rock and roll. then...

just sing to yourself for a moment: "it's got what it takes"...what does that even f?!?ing MEAN? wev

Posted by r@d@r @ 01/31/2008 12:25 PM

-Can someone please combine the DLR vocal tracks to the John Bonham drum tracks?? This would be amazing!!!

Posted by jim @ 01/31/2008 12:18 AM

I love it! Only Dave can sound that horrible and that great at the same time. That song alone has VH in the RNR Hall of Fame.

Posted by Dono @ 01/30/2008 11:50 PM

David Lee Roth is the one & only original one of a kind rock god. Anybody w/ half a brain knows that.Enough said...period end of story...anything else anyone needs to know?

Posted by wendywoo @ 01/30/2008 05:35 PM

David Lee Roth is the one & only original one of a kind rock god. Anybody w/ half a brain knows that.Enough said...period end of story...anything else anyone needs to know?

Posted by wendywoo @ 01/30/2008 05:35 PM

Wow! Thanks for posting this truly viral clip. Your blog is gonna make it to all my firends. This clip has really come in handy when we do random intercom all-pages at our advertising agency. The 20-somethings and 60-somethings don't have a clue, but the rest of us just had a great chuckle.

Posted by kim @ 01/30/2008 12:34 PM

This vocal track is horrendous if you listen with critical ears. The song is great for sure, but David Lee Roth is much more a showman than a musician. Sammy Hagar did an amazing job coming in and continuing the growth of the band, and I think we'll ALL agree that since Sammy left, Van Halen has failed to regain any of it's former potency. This new tour is ridiculous, whether you like Sammy or DD, leaving out MA for Eddie's son is a joke. This band is nothing more than a novelty at this point. You would need all three Original instrumentalists, AND either David Lee Roth or Sammy Hagar to even stand a chance at hearing something worthwhile. And DD still can't sing. So bring back Hagar and MA!

Posted by Get REAL @ 01/29/2008 03:07 PM

Have you seen juniors grades?

Posted by Greg @ 01/28/2008 08:40 PM

that was fucking awesome.

Posted by Sharon @ 01/27/2008 06:59 PM

betona: I saw VH for the first time at the Oklahioma Jam in 1977 or 1978. They had just played at the Texas jam in dallas a month before and friends who heard them said they were awesome. I saw them again several months later when they opened for Black Sabbath, and agree that they blew BS away that night. Never saw them again after 1980 but they were the soundtrack of my high school years. They just played in OKC this week. I didn't go but the reviews were incredible. Good to see the old farts can still kick out the jams.

Posted by Jim Eischen @ 01/27/2008 06:20 PM

when I sw VH in st.louis in 84 they were the kings of RR.dave swinging across the stage in leotards and eddie looking like a tard. but, he is the man with the guitar..period.nobody rocks like Eddie.they where a good team like dean and jerry. these things change like LIFE.i'll now pull the trigger.

Posted by moreofthesame @ 01/27/2008 03:50 PM

I just dig the tunes....silly me.

(yeah, I'm still workin' on getting more)

Posted by billy @ 01/26/2008 09:04 PM

The chemical compound known as Van Halen is one of the most complex known to RnR. The solid bond formed by the original VH elements, AVH and EDH, allowed them to release an originality unseen before in their respective position. Coupled with the precise interventions of MA and the explosive DLR, this volatile molecule became the one of the foundation of all electric noise we hear today. To this date, the compound known as VH is unique and hasn't been copied synthetically yet, even using some of it's original elements.

Posted by Richard Jean @ 01/26/2008 08:01 PM

As a musician of 30 plus years, I learned long ago not to care a fried rats nut about what other musicians thought about me. Your musician that couldn't afford a cab to the hotel would sell his children to be part of VH, but his ego will never admit it. The only true marker for how good a band is, comes from the, eyes riveted, hands in air, voices singing along, crowd that gathers at each and every performence. Not what some jealous wannabe spews.

Posted by Strat60 @ 01/26/2008 06:10 PM

I first saw VH when they were the backup band for Black Sabbath and they were incredible -- much better than Ozzie & Co. that night. Tight, pounding and mesmerizing.

A year later they came back through as the headline and we eagerly bought our tickets. This time, and every subsequent time I saw them (e.g., Texxas Jam) they were utterly awful. Out of synch, forgot their own lyrics, probably drunk on their ass. Awful. And with Dave screwing it up the entire time.

Posted by betona @ 01/26/2008 03:38 PM

might as well JUMP!!! off of a mountain....diamond dave was a cool early 80's drunkard....those pants gotta go though...and Eddie Van Halen always looks like a smiling retard...but now he's a cancer recovering retard! props all around...

Posted by maxeypad @ 01/26/2008 01:24 PM

you can't be proved wrong... its a mathematical proof. The dude is more rock and roll in his little toe than pretty much the entire universe.

Posted by tommi kazi @ 01/26/2008 01:19 PM

NO WAY was van hagar even CLOSE to VH. with Dave it was all about show, and u know what? that's what I want, ass kicking, bitch slappin hella coolness! van hagar gave u nuthin but gay ballads, all inspired by retard (but still guitar god) eddie. and the covers? ALL way better than originals, I love the kinks but VH kills U really got me. without DD, there IS NO VH!

Posted by ThunderLumber @ 01/26/2008 01:12 PM

Sorry, but dave was not great. he was an idiot, a preening media whore. Sammy is far better, a serious musician in comparison (which is a sad testiment to Diamond Dave if you ask me)... the Sammy VH years and albums are by and far the best.

Posted by DaveSucked @ 01/26/2008 11:05 AM

P.S. : The track was cool anyway!

Posted by Chip @ 01/26/2008 10:38 AM

I won't be popular here, but Dave sucks! I love old VH (AND Van Hagar) but with Dave it's the harmonies that carry the tune. All Dave does is talk and yell. Eddie IS the genious. Ever notice how they stopped doing cover tunes when Dave left? That was all Dave did when he was on his own. I caught the "Sam and Dave" Tour and when watching them head to head, Sammy just kicks Dave's ass! What little voice Dave had is GONE! Now if Eddie would get his head out of his ass and get Mike and Sammy back, all would be well. One last note: a friend saw them in Vegas around New Year's, annd said the arena was more than half empty. Wake up Eddie!

Posted by Chip @ 01/26/2008 10:35 AM

Rockin'! Even with all the effects, this is some genuine rockin' shit.

Posted by Barry @ 01/26/2008 08:06 AM

Fanfu**intastic.

Thank you.

Posted by estee @ 01/26/2008 02:53 AM

I lived in St. Louis, in the early 80s, and St. Louis is a big Sammy Hagar town. So I know lots of Hagar. "Three Lock Box" is my fave. Not big on 55, but I still always liked him.

But the Hagar era sucked big time.

The key? DLR is a jerk. A jerk with an ego that'll fill a stadium stage. I'd hate to work with him, but when he's on stage, he'll blow everyone else off it. So Eddie VH, who is normally very quiet and introspective, had to kick it up in order to show his genius. And he was. He redefined rock guitar in the 80s.

What always gets me is that he became such a drunk in order to reconcile himself, and he hurt himself so bad he now has bionic hips. Which makes me sad.

Posted by Dave @ 01/25/2008 10:57 PM

That was cool, how was the music cut out? Would love to hear more of the same!

Posted by fullbug @ 01/25/2008 09:41 PM

It's funny how much he does the asthma screech in just this one song, you don't even realize it until you hear it isolated like this. Amazing.

Posted by Karswell @ 01/25/2008 08:03 PM

You're wrong. Dave's vocals were awesome, no doubt. But Eddie's a genius. Dave's no genius. Dave's a showman imitating a Led Zeppelin vocal. What he's doing on this track is hilarious, but it's just "Whole Lotta Love" regurgitated. Dave's a big 'ol slap happy fan of rock and roll. And, that's cool and fun. But Eddie's an original. Eddie's a visionary.

Posted by deed @ 01/25/2008 06:53 PM

It was all fun and games until they made 1984.

I don't know who's idea it was to make that festering pile of shit, but I was already reeling from Diver Down and that synth-pop fucking keyboard riff in "Jump" was the nail in their coffin for me.

So if it was Dave's idea to manufacture that shit sound, then they did the right thing in dumping him.

Posted by Chumprock @ 01/25/2008 05:05 PM

This is the best thing I have ever listened to in my entire life, especially the "Oh God, oh God, I'm runnnnnin' OWWWW". Thank you, this made my week.
Jules
House of Jules

Posted by HouseofJules @ 01/25/2008 02:56 PM

As someone that is the number one google result for "Sammy Hagar Sucks" this comment thread is cracking up. That is until I got to the comment that Eat 'em Smile sucked. Fool. That is the last great Van Halen record if you ask me! Granted there are some bad tracks but that record is amazing. It's even better in spanish!

I can't stand Hagar. Hate the man. In the worlds of David Lee Roth. "Sam throws a party, I am the party."

BTW How did you isolate jus the vocals?

Posted by essl @ 01/24/2008 04:13 PM

More isolated vocal tracks, please. This was the most awesome thing I've encountered in weeks.

Posted by Alex @ 01/24/2008 03:31 PM

"Randy"?
"Yes".
"Paula"?
"Yes".
"I say Yes".

"Welcome to Hollywood!"

Posted by Don Schenck @ 01/24/2008 10:05 AM

Ah....Crazy From The Heat.
Ghost written beginning to end by Mr. Henry Rollins. Neat.

Posted by billy @ 01/22/2008 06:50 PM

Oh Jesus, thanks for the Crazy from the Heat mp3. Priceless.

Posted by jim @ 01/22/2008 02:51 PM

Re: The Iggy argument.
OF COURSE no one gives a rats ass about an Iggy-less Stooges. I was making refrence to the Ig's odious solo output post -'Idiot' M-Kay?

Posted by Benny @ 01/21/2008 05:05 PM

Just so this doesn't get too damned crazy, here's an mp3 of DLR reading the first chapter of his hilarious masterpiece "Crazy From The Heat". Enjoy! http://www.megaupload.com/?d=HAAIQZ76

Posted by Henry Owings @ 01/20/2008 10:46 PM

Benny...while I'll appreciate your hypothesis I could pick it apart like a buzzard pulling scraps off fresh roadkill.

POINT OF ORDER:
Nobody in their right mind is going to care one fuck-wit about watching or hearing "The Stooges" sans Ig.
Anymore would just be piling on.

A better case study in this matter would perhaps be Mick Jagger. Compare "Tattoo You" with "She's The Boss" (with only 3 or so years between them) and there you find your example.

Glad I could help.

Posted by billy @ 01/20/2008 09:36 PM

Five artists whos later-era albums have revealed them to be only as good as the people who are backing them up.
1.Iggy Pop
2.Alice Cooper(80's Kane Roberts era)
3.Debbie Harry.
4.Elvis Costello (minus Attractions, during his Bacarach obsessed period)
5.DAVID LEE ROTH- post VH
Although in Dave's defense, the seldom heard 'DLR Band' record from the late 90's he made is actually good! No ,really! check your local 99 cent CD bin, thats where I got my copy.

Posted by Benny @ 01/20/2008 08:42 PM

Just a recap:

Early Montrose/Van Halen = quality

Late Montrose/Van Halen = shit

Maybe we should encourage David Lee Roth to join Montrose. It might lead to something as fantastic as the bluegrass album he sang on a few years back (Strummin' with the Devil??).

I'm glad we sorted that out.

Posted by Bennett @ 01/20/2008 12:20 AM

That first Montrose record rules, end of story.

5150 is the best tape to listen toon a Walkman while cutting your parents' grass circa '86.

I'm not a Hagar apologist by the way.

VH KICK ASS!

Posted by Chuck @ 01/19/2008 07:57 PM

DLR's post-Van Halen career is proof that the Roth-Van Halen relationship was mutually beneficial. Sure, Eat 'em and Smile sucked ass, but so did 5150. Had the two camps not parted company when they did, there may have been some solid collaboration left in 'em.

And as far as Hagar goes, I've listened to Montrose, and I don't find it any better than the "I can't drive 55" era Hagar. And while penning songs that speak out against Carter-era efforts to curb rapid gas consumption appeals to rednecks (and red rockers), it didn't inspire people to do much more than drink domestic beer and mumble "right on".

Posted by Bennett @ 01/18/2008 10:22 PM

Defenders of DLR always seem to ignore his post-VH solo-turds (Eat em and Smile'/Your Filthy Little Mouth ect.) All total, Steve Vai wankery- infected shit!
Don't act like those embarrasments never happened.

Conversely, All Hagar slaggers do not own / have never heard the first, Hagar-fronted Montrose record, and are therefore complete posers who are either only into "Classic VH, Man" in a wink-wink, devil-horns, ironic way or they simply hate real rock n' roll.

Posted by Benny @ 01/18/2008 06:06 PM

One break....coming up!!!!

Posted by Adam O. @ 01/18/2008 05:48 PM

http://www.dsrstudio.com/woman-left-lonely.mp3

Posted by dsr @ 01/18/2008 12:12 AM

Hey, Hank. Congrats on giving a musician a ride to his hotel, you blowhard. Oh, the stories you could tell! DLR-era Van Halen is superior to the Hagar and Cherone years. Thanks for that newsflash you fat fuck.

Hey, Teasley, I'm back and you are going down. I will destroy everyone associated with Chunklette in 2008. One by motherfucking one. First up: The Gooch. You've all been warned. Game over.

Pussyfagcunt,

-Regmeister.

Posted by Reggie @ 01/17/2008 10:15 PM

If only Eddie had listened:

http://youtube.com/watch?v=9Ahzk5OPtzY

Posted by Sam @ 01/17/2008 01:04 PM

Agreed Chuck, DD is the turning point.
If Sammy is the Hair plugs, Wolfie is definitely the taint of Van Halen.

Posted by Cheri Pi @ 01/17/2008 11:03 AM

Wait, wait, wait,

"the wife and I were giving a Mancunian guitarist a ride to a downtown airport hotel"

fuck the DRL- I wanna hear that story!

(and BIG ups to my buddy Jer for the track!)

Posted by billy @ 01/17/2008 01:15 AM

Awesome post. Dave rules. Diver Down has got some jams on it, for real. Don't count it out, Cheri Pi.

Posted by Chuck @ 01/16/2008 07:51 PM

If David Lee Roth is the soul of VH, then Eddie is the dick, Alex is the ass and Michael Anthony is the liver.

Jack Daniels!

Sammy is the hair plugs, and Gary Cherone, if we're even counting him, is the fucking toupee.

Wolfie?? The pubes?

Posted by Bennett @ 01/16/2008 07:40 PM

Its no secret that Valerie Bertinelli "ruined" Van Halen as evidenced in their '82 release Diver Down, it's literally a downward spiral for VH after Val & Eddie celebrate their ill-begotten nuptials in 1981.
Their legacy lives on as the Van Halen/Bertinelli progeny Wolfy, slowly evolves into his bobble-headed father, in search of a high only bare-assed spandex chaps and a can of hairspray can bring.

Posted by Cheri Pi @ 01/16/2008 05:21 PM

I'm sitting here listening to this, and AC/DC's 'Let There Be Rock' is on in my living room. I think my sanity just raped itself.

Posted by Daniel Kaproth @ 01/16/2008 05:12 PM

You know, Sam, you're totally right, but I just can never tell when some batshit nuts Sammy Hagar afficianado's gonna stumble across this site the way The Mars Volta fans did last week. Best to draw lines in the sand that nobody will cross, right?

Posted by Henry Owings @ 01/16/2008 04:06 PM

Who fucking disputes this point?! Is the Chunklet site filled with Sammy defenders?!?!?!?! God Damnit baby, you know I 'aint lying! DLR rules as long as he's not doing radio.....

Sam

Posted by Sam @ 01/16/2008 01:52 PM